Remember when your parents told you certain little things that you never even questioned? They lied.
Kids ask a lot of questions, and sometimes it’s just easier to lie. But, hey, can you really blame parents?
Here here are the most common lies your parents told you and (let’s face it) we kinda still believe. Enjoy.
SITTING TOO CLOSE TO THE TV WILL RUIN YOUR EYESIGHT/YOU’LL GO BLIND
Another myth. Children are better at focusing on up-close objects than adults. So old people in the back. Beware, however, that sitting close to the TV may be an indication of nearsightedness.
IF YOU PEE IN A POOL, THERE’S A SPECIAL DYE THAT WILL TURN IT RED/BLUE SO EVERYBODY KNOWS
While it is a fact that this is a great idea, sadly, it’s just a myth. Not a bad one to make the kids think. I am sure to this day, there are some adults that still believe it enough to (how can I say this?) test the waters.
YOU CAN’T GO SWIMMING FOR 30 MINUTES AFTER EATING
A parental myth based on the idea that after a big meal, blood will be diverted away from your arms and legs, towards your stomach’s digestive tract. If your limbs do not get enough blood flow to function, you are at risk of drowning.
Parents had a perfect excuse for this one. A great idea for kids to wait to go in the pool after dinner: Dishes
IF YOU KEEP MAKING THAT FACE, IT’LL GET STUCK LIKE THAT FOREVER
There is no recorded evidence of anyone’s eyes or face actually getting stuck as a result of childhood (or adulthood) facial acrobatics. Your face muscles are elastic and will always return to their original shape. Otherwise, Jim Carey would look permanently like a piece a bark caught in a meat grinder.
CRACKING YOUR KNUCKLES WILL GIVE YOU ARTHRITIS
Is it annoying to hear a kid cracking bones repeatedly sucking and popping in and out of their lubricated joints? That is probably something you’ve heard at least once in your life, likely from your mom, concerned that your fidgeting habit will give you arthritis. Cracking your knuckles does not cause arthritis. (Sorry,Mom.)
IF YOU SNEEZE WITH YOUR EYES OPEN, THEY MIGHT FALL OUT
Yes, you can sneeze with your eyes open. And, no, the schoolyard legend isn’t true. Most people naturally close their eyes when they sneeze, but if you hold them open, even though the blood pressure behind your eyes is technically elevated, your eyes will absolutely not pop out of your head.
IF YOU EAT THAT WATERMELON SEED, A TREE WILL GROW IN YOUR STOMACH
This one is almost true, only, it forgot one crucial step: you must poop out the seed for the tree to grow.
READING IN THE DARK WILL DAMAGE YOUR EYES
Parents will say anything when it’s time to get their kids to bed. Vision tends to weaken over time for most people. Reading in low light won’t cause a decline in vision, it can lead to eye strain.
IF YOU SWALLOW YOUR GUM, IT WILL STAY IN YOUR STOMACH FOR SEVEN YEARS
I am sure this is the real reason all the gum found on the undersides of school desks, benches and basically any other public surfaces you dare to run your fingers beneath. Though entirely untrue, the myth has proven to be a fairly effective way to keep children — and some adults — from swallowing gum. How and where the seven years originated is also still unknown.
IF YOU TOUCH A TOAD/FROG, YOU’LL GET WARTS
Frogs and toads have a bad rap. The perfect excuse parents gave a simple reason why their son/daughter cannot have a pet toad. Of course, it’s just another parental myth.
DRINKING COFFEE WILL STUNT YOUR GROWTH
Some still view giving caffeine to a child as tantamount to giving them cigarettes. And while it’s true that we could all likely do with a little less caffeine in our daily lives (and the sugar that often comes with it), it will not stunt a child’s growth.
EATING CARROTS WILL GIVE YOU GREAT NIGHT VISION
If you currently need corrective lenses, no amount of carrots in your diet will bring your vision up to 20/20. The best reason parents can think of for their kids to finish those carrots. All of them.
THE FAMILY PET WENT TO LIVE ON A FARM…WHERE HE’LL HAVE LOTS OF ROOM TO RUN AND PLAY FOREVER!
Sometimes, when a young one asks a difficult question, the easiest answer is a straight up lie. End of story.
*LIFE’S A BEACH